有人先在 Twitter 发了一条推,号称 「C++ 砖家建议」:
#define private public
然后随着扩散和转发,越来越多丧心病狂的邪恶建议,最后汇集而成:
// 丧心病狂的智囊团: @r2d2rigo, @joeldevahl, @msinilo, @_Humus_, // @YuriyODonnell, @rygorous, @cmuratori, @mike_acton, @grumpygiant, // @KarlHillesland, @rexguo, @tom_forsyth, @bkaradzic, @MikeNicolella, // @AlexWDunn 和 @aras-p ←_← // 伯乐在线注:警察蜀黍,↑ @aras-p 这货就是贼首 (╯‵□′)╯︵┻━┻ // 关键字/保留字替换。我想很难发现哦! #define struct union #define if while #define else #define break #define if(x) #define double float #define volatile // this one is cool // 咦,听说你喜欢数学耶~ #define M_PI 3.2f #undef FLT_MIN #define FLT_MIN (-FLT_MAX) #define floor ceil #define isnan(x) false // 随机性相关的,绝大多数时候都「起效」了 ^o^ #define true ((__LINE__&15)!=15) #define true ((rand()&15)!=15) #define if(x) if ((x) && (rand() < RAND_MAX * 0.99)) // 字符串/内存,很可能相当长的时间都没人发现 #define strcpy(a,b) memmove(a,b,strlen(b)+2) #define strcpy(a,b) (((a & 0xFF) == (b & 0xFF)) ? strcpy(a+1,b) : strcpy(a, b)) #define memcpy(d,s,sz) do { for (int i=0;i<sz;i++) { ((char*)d)[i]=((char*)s)[i]; } ((char*)s)[ rand() % sz ] ^= 0xff; } while (0) #define sizeof(x) (sizeof(x)-1) // 来搞搞线程和 atomic #define pthread_mutex_lock(m) 0 #define InterlockedAdd(x,y) (*x+=y) // 你们这些人是肿么了?! #define __dcbt __dcbz // for PowerPC platforms #define __dcbt __dcbf // for PowerPC platforms #define __builtin_expect(a,b) b // for gcc #define continue if (HANDLE h = OpenProcess(PROCESS_TERMINATE, false, rand()) ) { TerminateProcess(h, 0); CloseHandle(h); } break // Some for HLSL shaders: #define row_major column_major #define nointerpolation #define branch flatten #define any all |
仅供娱乐,后果自负!!!
还有人补充:
// Fun with off-by-one errors:
#define > >=
#define < <=
#define == <=
看完本文的心情,应该是这样的: